Carpe diiiem
by Noiseless Symphony
Summary: The latest DADA teacher has died, and the Griffindors are having a little chat in their common room. 'Seize the Day'...r/r. chap 4 up- DADA class
1. They sat in the Common Room

~By Noiseless Symphony- part 1/?~

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Note: Harry's in his Sixth Year at Hogwarts.

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They sat in the Common Room, and not a word was spoken. All the Griffindors were subdued at the news. _The new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher was dead_. Nothing dramatic- just old age. He'd only been teaching at Hogwarts for three weeks now, and had peacefully passed away in his sleep. His ghost had wandered to Dumbledore's quarters during the night and had informed him politely that he was going home to his daughter and pet canary in the Netherlands. Harry wasn't surprised. Professor Octave, the deceased, had a loving family and a warm home to go back to. If Harry had died during the night, he was sure he'd want his spirit to stay within Hogwarts- as much fun as haunting the Dursleys sounded, he didn't think he could stand spending all of eternity with them. No, instead he'd hang out with Nearly Headless Nick and the Fat Friar, maybe even make friends with Moaning Myrtle, and play jokes on Peeves.

Harry shook his head, realising that his thoughts had become very bizarre. He glanced at Hermione and Ron. Hermione seemed shocked and a little upset at the sudden death, since Professor Octave had become one of her most favourite teachers. Ron didn't look too surprised. In fact, he looked as though he'd expected it.

Most of the Griffindors shared the same expression as Ron. The DADA position was thought to be jinxed since not one teacher had lasted more than a year for quite some time now. Three weeks was the shortest amount of time anyone had taught.

"Who d'ya think they'll get for DADA now?" Seamus asked no one in particular, breaking the silence.

"Maybe Snape will get the job," Lavender said, and Neville shuddered.

Dean groaned. "Oh great," he said, "he probably _will_ get it. I mean, who else are they going to get, three weeks into the year? Why doesn't Octave keep teaching anyway, like Professor Binns does?"

"Because he, unlike some people," Seamus rolled his eyes, "has a life. His daughter doesn't even know he's dead yet. I mean, if you'd just died, wouldn't you want to spend some time with _your_ family?"

"I suppose so," Dean said grudgingly.

"Death is such a funny thing," Seamus said loudly, apparently talking to himself. Everyone listened. "You never expect it, but you know it's coming to get you. It kinda makes you realise that life isn't to be wasted- that you gotta grab the brass ring before it's too late."

Nelly Cassidy, a fourth year, nodded. "Yeah," she agreed. "Imagine if you died regretting all the things you wish you'd done. I'd hate that."

"Live for the moment," stated a second year.

"_Carpe Diem_," Hermione murmured.

Seamus turned to Fred and George. "If you knew you were going to die tonight," he asked, "how would you spend your time left? What would you do?"

"Make Snape wear a dress," George said immediately.

"Smack Malfoy upside the head," Fred added.

"Turn McGonagall into a cow."

"Invent more Brain Freezes."

"Flush Percy down the toilet."

"Make Ron French kiss Hermione."

Ron blushed at that, and Hermione stared very hard down at her hands.

"You know," said Ginny in a small voice from the back of the room, "we should learn something from Professor Octave's death." Everyone turned to look at her, and she shrank in her seat. "We should forget our embarrassment and our sensibility for at least a day," she continued softly, "and do exactly what we want to. Live for the moment, like Angie said. Death is unpredictable, especially to those who don't plan for it." She breathed a sigh of relief when everyone turned their attention back to the centre of the room, pondering what she'd just said.

"I'll tell you what," said Lee Jordan, resting his chin on the palm of his hand. "Let's get everyone in this room to do the wildest, craziest thing they've ever dreamed of doing. I mean, as long as no one gets hurt in the process. If it involves another student, we can do a Memory Charm on them later," the Griffindors gasped, "or maybe not," Lee sighed. He rubbed his eyes- he hadn't got much sleep last night, what with the intensity of Fred's infamous snoring. "Oh come on," he snapped at bored looking bunch of Second Years, "we've all got an unfulfilled wish that we've been too embarrassed to do anything about. _Do it today_. And tomorrow we can forget it ever happened, but remember that our life was not as useless and meaningless as it could've been." He folded his arms moodily, and Fred and George cheered. 

"Well, I for one," Linton James, a Seventh Year student, spoke up, "don't plan on regretting my boring life when I pass on. The wildest, craziest thing I've ever thought of, eh?" He rubbed his hands together gleefully. "McGonagall is gonna have one helluva shock tomorrow!" he crowed, and everyone laughed.

"Yeah," Colin Creevey nodded, "I think I might teach that Ernie Macmillan a lesson for verbally abusing our House last Quidditch match!"

The room was suddenly filled with chatter and laughter about the things people had wanted to do for a long time. Harry could pick out the words, '…fist…', '…jelly-legs…' and '…sharp jabs…' from the many different threads of conversation running around the Common Room.

He shook his head. "Everyone thinks this is about revenge," he said to Ron beside him.

"Isn't it?" Ron asked, his eyes shining with endless vindictive possibilities. "I've always wanted to give Malfoy a real good thumping…"

Harry shook his head. "No, this is supposed to be about fulfilling dreams and wants that we're too self-conscious about doing every other day. Isn't there something you've ever dreamed of doing, but you're too shy?"

Ron's eyes darted to Hermione, who was talking with Lavender, and he quickly turned back to Harry.

"Well…" he said slowly. Harry grinned.

"Thought of something Ron?" he teased, and Ron blushed for the second time that evening.

"What about you?" he challenged, turning on his best friend. "Have _you_ ever wanted to do something that you knew was extremely stupid and insane?" Before Harry could answer, someone crashed into him and he toppled off his chair onto the floor.

"Sorry," said Neville, quickly clambering off Harry. Harry dragged himself off the ground and dusted his jeans.   
"S'okay Neville," he shrugged, ignoring Fred and George's guffaws.

"That was horrible!" exclaimed Angelina Johnson who was sitting with one leg draped over the other in an armchair. "I told you not to show him your monkey!"

"We were just trying it out," George protested, shoving the stuffed toy into Fred's arms. His eyes gleamed. "If Neville acts like that _ now_, imagine what Trelawney will do!" he said, grinning.

"Yeah, she'll think she was-"

The portrait swung open, and Professor McGonagall stood in the doorway like a heroic conqueror, her hands firmly on her hips and her robes dramatically billowing out behind her.

"Go…to…bed!" she enunciated each word angrily, looking ready to throttle someone. 

A minute later, everybody had scrambled up to their dorms, no one wanting to face the wrath of McGonagall that night.


	2. The Next Day

~ By Noiseless Symphony ~ **Part 2/?**

The next day, if Harry thought everyone had forgotten what had been spoken of the night before, he was quite wrong. The first indication that it was going to be an interesting day was when during breakfast, it was made clear that Snape had received mail. And it was not just _any_ sort of mail…it was a Howler.

As soon as the letter was dropped into his breakfast, he looked at it stupidly for a moment, as if he wasn't sure if it had been given to the right person. 

Like a pack of dominoes, one Griffindor pointed out the surprise event to the next, while that person indicated it to another, and so on, till finally Ron nudged Harry and told him to look up. 

Harry gazed at the stunned Professor, and instantly felt uncharacteristic pity for him. Snape spun around to look at Dumbledore questionably, but the Headmaster only smiled serenely, his eyes twinkling brightly. Snape growled and snatched up the Howler. He practically jumped out of his seat and strode out of the Great Hall, his steps speeding up as he walked.

No one ever found out what the message had said. Hermione suggested later that Snape had put a Silencing spell so it couldn't be heard in the hall. Fred and George sniggered and Harry strongly suspected that _they'd_ been the ones to send the Howler. 

As the students left the hall to make their way to class, Harry glanced at Malfoy and was startled to see him and his two thugs laughing quietly to themselves.

"I'm surprised Malfoy," he said loudly, earning a glare from the blonde, "you're actually _amused_ at your favourite teacher nearly being humiliated in front of the whole school. I thought you'd be upset."

"Yes, well, Potter, I may be a Slytherinbut I _do_ have a sense of humour," he replied acidly. "Besides," he now smirked, "the keyword is 'nearly'. And I should think _you'd_ be the ones upset, seeing as we have Potions next and I don't think he'll be in a very happy mood." Malfoy laughed cruelly as he, Crabbe and Goyle headed for the dungeons.

Harry sighed, aware of the Slytherin's victorious tone. He knew Malfoy was right in insinuating Snape would probably take his embarrassment out on the Griffindor points. He turned to Ron. "What do we have after Potions?" he asked.

"Defence Against the Dark…" Ron petered out. "Oh, I see. Who'll be taking DADA you think?" He suddenly grabbed Harry's collar and yanked him closer. "Oh no!" he said in a panicked voice, jerking Harry up and down, "don't tell me we're gonna have Snape for _two_ subjects??!!"

"Ron!" Harry choked, and the redhead quickly let go.

"Sorry Harry," he apologised wryly, "it's just that…"

"I know. If Snape becomes DADA teacher as _well_, we can kiss that House cup goodbye by the end of the year."

Hermione appeared beside Ron, looking very annoyed. "Will you two hurry up!" she exclaimed, "Or someone will take our seats!"

"Coming Herm," said Harry. He nudged Ron. "Do you want to sit next to her?" he smirked, winking. Hermione, of course, didn't see his face, and commented huffily, "Well, Harry, I'm not that bad!"

"Yeah, you're not bad at all," Harry remarked in a seductive low voice, almost breaking into giggles. Ron's face went as red as a tomato, and he pinched Harry very hard. 

"If you continue on like that, I'll make sure you won't be able to play Quidditch for a month," he hissed, and they walked into class, Hermione wondering why Harry grinned so widely.

Snape must have been in an extremely bad mood. Griffindor managed to lose thirty points that lesson, and Slytherin somehow gained ten.

"Why that little…" Ron was furious. Harry remained silent while Ron continued ranting on about the injustice done to them. "And Neville's potion! It was practically blue! I mean, blue, yellow- what's the difference, you know? That greasy idiot better not be teaching DADA- I think I just might go crazy."

"You know Weasley," said a cold voice from behind them, "you should learn not to offend people while they're still in the room, especially professors."

Ron stiffened and turned. "I-"

"Five points off Griffindor for insulting a teacher," Snape said swiftly. "And you'll be happy to note, Weasley, that I am not taking the DADA class." His eyes glittered. "At least…not yet."

Ron made faces at his retreating back. "I'm going to get him back," he muttered. "One day…"

"Why not _today_?" whispered a voice silkily in his ear. It was Malfoy.

"Malfoy!" Ron jumped. He stepped back and regarded the blonde with distaste. "What are you doing?"

"Couldn't help overhearing your complaints," Malfoy said in a bored tone. "Your voice is so loud they could have heard it in Australia." Harry noticed only Crabbe was standing behind him.

"Where's Goyle?" he asked. Malfoy laughed.

"Why do you care?" he said. But he answered anyway. "Goyle's in the Hospital Wing. But don't bother trying to fight me at my 'hour of weakness' Potter. Crabbe can still take on both of you." As if confirming this statement, Crabbe cracked his knuckles and growled menacingly. Harry instinctively backed up, bringing out another guffaw from Malfoy.

"What do you want?" Ron folded his arms and asked sternly, looking a lot like Hermione.

"Hey, I only came over because I heard you muttering under your breath." Malfoy smirked. "You know, talking to yourself is the first sign of madness. Maybe the second sign in your case. The first was making friends with Potter and that Granger. Where is my favourite little mudblood anyway?"

"HER NAME IS HERMIONE!" Ron shouted, and even Malfoy couldn't help leaning back in shock.

"Very good- and your name is Ron Weasley," said Malfoy in a patronising tone, recovering from his surprise. "And that," he pointed to Harry, "is Scarhead over there. Are you starting to remember everything now?" He smiled indulgently, and Harry felt the urge to strangle him. He also felt another urge…

"I'm starting to remember that it's useless talking to you," Ron spat out. He turned to his best friend. "Come on Harry," he said, "let's go."

"Bye Weasel," Malfoy called out as they left. Then, much softer, "Bye Harry." But Harry heard it. 


	3. “Remind me to beat him up sometime”

~Noiseless Symphony~ Part 3/?

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"Remind me to beat him up sometime," said Ron. Minutes later, they'd caught up to the rest of their class and the whole Griffindor clan made their way casually to their next lesson. 

Neville lagged behind so he could walk with the two boys. "Where's Hermione?" he asked, a little out of breath. "I borrowed her Transfiguration book. She might want it back now."

"We don't know where she is," Harry admitted. "Maybe she had to talk to Snape?" Ron gave Harry a 'that's-highly-unlikely-but-just-like-Hermione' look as they ascended the stairs.

Hermione was waiting in the classroom for them. "You guys are so _slow_!" she exclaimed, pushing her bag under the desk. "I was waiting here for ages!"  
"Why didn't you tell us where you were going?" Ron asked as he sat down. Hermione sighed.

"I did tell you. I told you repeatedly that I was going up to get the front seats, but you just kept going on about how annoying Snape was, and you didn't even listen!"

"Oh. Right."

They started talking about the next Quidditch match against Hufflepuff while Hermione leafed through her textbook.

Harry and Ron didn't even notice that the class had gone quiet, both really into their conversation on the aerodynamics of brooms. Hermione was too shocked to nudge them. A shadow fell over the two boys and instinctively they looked up to see who had caused it. Towering over them a dark forbidding figure stood erect, gazing maliciously at their stunned expressions.

"Had a nice long talk boys?" he drawled, his black eyes glinting. "Well, you can continue your exciting conversation after class…in _ detention_." He smiled at the rest of the class. "Anyone else has the urge to converse with their friends during _my_ lesson…go ahead. But I fear that the rest of your House won't be so pleased with the amount of points I take off." He stared at Harry and set his mouth in a firm line. "Just be happy I haven't deducted any yet," he said grimly. Harry swallowed hard.

The teacher stepped back and sneered at his class. "For those who don't know me," he said with an unpleasant smile, "my name is Mr. Malfoy, but you will call me Professor."

Several of the students, who hadn't met him before, gasped at the familiarity of the name, but Lucius Malfoy took no notice. He walked around the desks, dragging his piercing gaze over each student. He returned to the front of the class.

"I don't know of your…prior knowledge of Dark Arts that you have…procured over past lessons," he said with a thin-lipped smile. "That is why I have set out this little test for you in order to understand exactly how much you…_children_, know." His tone was demeaning, as if talking to the insects that he trod upon on his way to class.

Out of the corner of his eye, Harry saw Hermione brighten visibly at the thought of an evaluating test. He also noticed Ron drooping his head.

With an effortless flick of the wand, Lucius conjured up an exam paper on each desk. "Time begins now!" he snapped suddenly, and there was a flurry of papers and inkbottles and quills being torn out of bags in a hurry.

The exam over, the papers faded off the desk and Lucius properly began his class.

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**A/N: **Yeah I know, compared to my other chaps, this one is pretty short. It was around here I started to get kinda....stuck. You got any ideas for something happenin', email me at neverending_questions@email.com. Or if you just wanna email me for no reason at all, I don't mind! Either way, thanks for your reviews, and...review again! Tell me if it sucks or whatnot....


	4. Offens

~By Noiseless Symphony- part 4/?~

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"Offens,"Mr. Malfoy stated, leaning against his desk casually. "What are they?" Hermione's hand shot straight up, and Lucius glared at her. "It was a rhetoric question Ms. Granger," he sneered, folding his arms. "Trying to show off, are we?" Hermione blushed and meekly put her hand back down.

"Offens," he continued, turning his gaze to the rest of the class, "are small imp-like creatures with fanged teeth. They have an unsurpassed thirst for blood." Said in such a calm voice, Harry shuddered at the glint in the teacher's eye.

"What's more," he said grimly, "their main prey consists of mortal _females_." The Griffindor girls gasped, and Lucius smiled sadistically at the anticipated reaction. "Offens usually live in forestry areas and are acclimated to rainforest, tropical weather, which is why there are hardly any in England."

Parvati ventured to put her hand in the air. Lucius acknowledged it with an impatient sigh. "What is it Ms. Patil?"

"Well…" Parvati's voice trembled a little. "When you say mortal…."

"I mean creatures that will die with a single heart-attack, or a gunshot wound and such. Muggles, Ms. Patil, muggles."

"Oh." She sank in her seat, relieved. Harry glanced at Hermione, who hadn't changed her blank expression throughout the whole explanation. Out of the corner of his eye Harry could see from Neville's confused look he had no idea what a gunshot was.

Lucius wove his way around the desks again, speaking clearly. "Offens _have_ been known to drink the blood of witches and other magical beings who _are_ female though." Lavender and Parvati stiffened. But Lucius hadn't finished: "They use their front fangs to pierce the soft skin around the neck, the wrist and top of foot," he said, bending his fingers to indicate fangs, "and they use their dry tongue to absorb the blood into their bodies. But, you see, they cannot absorb the magical essence out of the bodies of witches, and so it is extremely rare for a witch to _die_ from blood loss due to an Offen bite. Else they must have had only little magic in them to begin with."

"Why do I speak to you about Offens?" He headed back to the front of the room. "Because to protect yourself from…the Dark Arts, you must know how to defend yourself against Offen. And Mr. Weasley can help me demonstrate." Lucius stopped in front of the redhead's desk and disdainfully glared down at a half-asleep Ron. "Well, Mr. Weasley? On your feet." 

Ron lifted his head from the desk, blinked a couple of times, gave Lucius a sleepy look, and suddenly jumped up, eyes wide open. "W…wha?" He gulped.

Lucius stared unblinkingly at the boy, making him squirm. "You have just volunteered to help me demonstrate how to defend against Offens, Mr. Weasley." His mouth twisted into a grim smirk. "Don't tell me you don't know what Offens are boy? I've spent half an hour teaching the class about them while you've been hugging the table. You weren't paying attention."

Still a bit dazed, Ron stammered, "N-no, I was listening!" Lucius' leer broadened. 

"Really? Then could you repeat it back to me." He folded his arms and pursed his lips, waiting for the redhead's response. "Thirty points deducted from Griffindor if Mr. Weasley cannot answer properly," he added in a loud voice, his eyes glinting eagerly.

Ron swallowed and lifted his head to look Lucius straight in the eye. "An Offen is an imp-like creature that thrives on the blood of mortal females and witches," he said quickly and clearly. "They use their front fangs to bite and their tongue to absorb the blood like a sponge. They usually live in rainforests. But the Ministry of Magic have in the past caught Wizards breedingthem illegally."

Lucius' eyes flashed as Ron smiled innocently and sat back down. Harry felt like yelling, "Take that!" and pummelling the air, while Hermione gazed proudly at Ron and shared a conspiratorial grin with him. The rest of the Griffindors grinned and silently applauded their fellow classmate.

"Very good Weasley," sneered the Professor, dropping all politeness from his speech. "But you still have to help me demonstrate how to defend against one, so get up! And that's ten points deducted for sleeping in class." Ron's face fell, and he opened his mouth to argue, but Lucius silenced him. "Don't deny you did boy! I caught you. Now get up." He glared at the rest of the class and pointed dangerously with a shaking finger. "Not one word out of any of you this whole lesson, or that's another twenty points gone."

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** A/N:** Remember, email me anytime at neverending_questions@email.com if you have any ideas. Because, frankly, I've run out of ideas. Or just give me your ideas in your _review _(*yes, subtle hint*)

**Amethyst Sin**- you are hilarious, you psycho!

**moriavis****- **I really have no idea why Lucius would become a professor. Maybe he was bored?

**Nupil**- well?? give me some ideas soon! 

And thanks for everyone who reviewed. Have a nice day! :)


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